Crisis

I think I'm facing an identity crisis.

It's like, I don't know who the fuck I really am anymore.

Are the friend-dissing, uber-nice, emo-shit, weird-ass, homo-extraordinaire, cold-cuntfaced people all really the same human being? It's scary how all of us are actually related.

I'm becoming increasingly weird. I find so. People find so. Why? I have no idea.

Oh, and about my studies. I just found out how much more fucked I really am. Exams are in 8 days.

Yeah. EIGHT FUCKING DAYS!! And I've only covered 2 weeks worth of lectures. Not to mention that I've already forgotten most of what I studied yesterday.

Life's so sad.

You think you've covered a lot in a day, having studied a weekful of lectures. Only to find out from the people next door that the language they speak, is from a whole different galaxy. And to think their still frustrated with what they know. Yeah. It's a real putdown.

Try living with that. Come back the next day. Interact with other beings who have just began learning the language, who end up knowing twice as much as you do. And when prompted to educate them further, you realise that everything that you know, is in fact nothing at all.

GET IT?! YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW ANYTHING!!!!!

And this is why, I hate what I'm going through right now and the sole reason to why I wish that the exams would just come and go, so that I can go back to Penang.

So that the calender pages will actually begin to flip forward. So that the new semester will be upon us.

So that I will continue flunking everything there is to flunk.

So that the second semester will end.

So that I'll be able to return to Penang once again.

So that there are no pages left to tear in the calendar.

So you rip apart the calendar instead, and buy a new one.

So that everything else will come to an end.

EVERYTHING.

I just want to relive the holidays once again. How hard can it be? Even with this nightmare being in the way.

See why I so badly need a single room at the condo?